This year has been a full one. There has been a lot of great moments and some not so great ones. There has been a lot of change. I fell crazy deep in love with a wonderful person. I finished my freshman year of college and moved into my sophomore year. I had a ton of new experiences like going to Gary for the first time, riding a Ferris Wheel, getting fired from a job, getting in a car accident, getting pulled over for the first time, running into a Sheriff because I was trespassing (he was very nice), getting my first tattoo, smoking for the first time, changing my major and my first car died in the parking lot of a gas station. I did a lot of exploring, driving, thinking and saw a lot of new places. I made my first road trip and I saw the Atlantic Ocean for the first time. I got over some really rough thoughts and decided that living was better than dying. I got better at taking photos and also decided that photography was not what I wanted to do for a living. I met new people, including Austrian royalty, and made some new friends. I switched jobs a few times and learned a lot about work and how it plays into life. My mom moved and we said goodbye to a house that had been home for nearly seven years. I read a lot and wrote a lot. I wrote some good stuff and some not so good stuff. I got some good grades and some bad ones. I got into arguments and got a lot better at saying sorry and making up. I learned a lot about myself and how I work. I learned how to express myself, how to deal with some of my issues, how to apologize, how to stand up for myself, and how to listen. Like I said it has been a year of change, growth and new experiences. I sit here and look forward to another year of new experiences, new places, and new people. I see a year of challenges, new memories to be made and new things to discover not only about the world but about myself. This challenge has been a good one. It has definitely been a challenge. I have loved it and hated it. Now it’s finished and I’m glad I did it and finished it. So here’s to a great year filled with great times and great challenges.
Today we decorated the Christmas tree at my mom’s house. This tree was kind of special, as it was the first tree in the new house, it was the first real tree that Hannah had gone to cut down and it was the first tree that we decorated together. We also strung popcorn that night, which was another first for Hannah. I had a lot of fun and it was nice sharing these traditions with her. The tree turned out beautiful and I think a great Christmas is in store for the new house.
A portrait. A good portrait. Or so I thought. I liked this photo and several others I did of Hannah and Alyee. And when I presented them they got torn apart. So have a lot of my other photos, but for some reason it bugged me a little more this time. Maybe because I genuinely thought they were good. I don’t know. I’m not used to criticism. I’ve always just been told my work was good. And now I get told differently. But I can’t argue with the criticism. I see the flaws. I see where I messed up and could have done better. Turn it this way, crop here, avoid that object, open up these shadows, step back, look this way, lighten it, darken it. I need it. But it certainly is a new experience. And that fall from the pedestal isn’t very fun.
For the weekend my professor told us to take some photos that represented our Labor Day and also to not make them stereotypical. So I went to the lake. In Cicero this is where people spend their Labor Day. Out on their boats enjoying the end of summer. I walked along the docks and watched various boats go by, and fishers cast their lines, and kids play in the park. And I saw these two boats. This kinda sums up Cicero. This very old, beat up pontoon boat, right next to a big, brand new, expensive boat. Old and New. Expensive and Cheap.
It’s an interesting change from last year. Last year around this time I was single, on my own, and a freshman. Everything was new and different. I was also in a group of people that I should not have been involved with and who I thought were different people than what they actually were. And then I met her. It’s crazy how one person can change your life. And now I sit in a new room with her by my side as we read, and do homework and talk. And so many things have changed. I have nothing do to with those people, I’m crazy in love, Marian is like a second home, and the way I look at things has changed. I’ve been through a lot and grown, switched up jobs, been to new places and done new things. But by far the biggest and best change was meeting her and then falling in love with her.
I chuckle as I cast my line out thinking how many parents take their children fishing, the most patient past time, for the most impatient at heart.
Relaxing and stressful all in the same hand, unless of course you’re fishing upstream in Alaska during salmon season, haha!
I hit the local ‘pay here to fish’ pond, simply to relax & a decent place to watch the sun melt beyond the trees in front of me. I love nothing more than summer country nights!
This is where the majority of my classes are this semester. It’s called the Evan Center and is home to the College of Osteopathic Medicine and the School of Nursing. It’s clean and new and very nice. But it’s a medical building and it now houses the art department. Our hall caught on fire and was demolished and will now be turned into a parking lot which is sad and angering but what am I going to do. Instead of building us a new building we were stuck in the unfinished section of this building and we have class as they paint the walls and wires dangle from the ceiling and what is left of Fisher is packed in scattered boxes. I like Marian and I love my professors (they are why I am here and not somewhere else), but it’s annoying to be on the bottom of the list. These amazing professors are stuck in a cramped, old building and our classrooms are unfinished. We are an after thought and it seems slightly wrong that the arts are on the bottom at what is supposed to be a liberal arts university. But it’s not anything new, having art at the bottom. Why should they support art? It doesn’t draw in lots of students and lots of money like a college of medicine does. Why in the world would they want to support art, the most primal and integral form of communication that humanity has and that allows us humans to express our humanity in profound and diverse ways. Maybe I’m just overreacting, but it’s frustrating. It’s frustrating to see a college spend millions on medicine and nothing on art, art history, photography, graphic design and art therapy. But oh well. My rant is over.
First day of classes. It’s an interesting feeling and much different than last year. Last year was the first year I had ever gone to a real classroom. So it was terrifyingly new. This year everything is familiar and different at the same time. New things to be learned in old classrooms and taught by professors I’ve already had. A new staircase in an old hall. New paths to be taken on sidewalks I’ve walked hundreds of times.
I moved back to Marian today. It was a long day of moving, getting myself and Hannah settled in our new rooms. I’m in good old Clare Hall again, just with a new room and roommate this year. I do have to say my room is much better than last semester. It’s a good start to a hopefully good semester. It does feel good to be back at Marian.
“Dreams come true and then they die. It’s time for new ones to come along. But the old ones still stand strong holding all the memories.” This quote comes from my mom and this post is for her. I like the quote and I liked her thought behind it. For her one of her dreams is coming to an end and it’s sad. It’s hard to watch something like that die. But it leaves room for something new. This tree above has had some life to it for the five years that we’ve known it. And then it finally died this year. But it still stands, tall and strong and holding all the memories of the past five years. And Mom I want to let you know that I am so proud of you and how hard you worked for your dream and even though it’s coming to a close just think of everything that awaits and the new dreams that will come.